Here’s a fun thing to do: Change your friends names in your phone to celebrity names. My friend Jessie has been David Duchovny in my phone for years. Once I lost my phone and I asked her to call it and some dude picked up and was all excitedly, “Hello???” And I was like, “Yeah, I think you have my phone?” And he was like, “Yeah, I’m just downstairs!!” And I walked down and all of his friends were gathered around and then just looked really disappointed and sulkily handed me my phone. In Jessie’s phone I’m The Pentagon and she missed my call once and the person she was with said, “The Pentagon just called.” Other fun names in my phone: My mom is Meryl Streep, my friend Rachel is Sidney Poitier, my friend Kate is David Bowie, and my friend Jack is Stockard Channing. Oh, and Seth is Amanda Bynes. Not to name drop or anything. (My background is my niece’s passport photos. So effing cute.)
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